To thine own self, be true

This is a quote I have always loved. It is what I aspire to. I have tried to instill this in my children as well. For them to find within themselves that which truly makes them happy and pursuing it with vigor. It is what I have always wanted for myself as well.

I have always admired those people who have been able to do this and make no apologies for it. They live their lives according to their own set of rules while still maintaining the universal law of Live and Let Live. I am not speaking of people who cause harm and pain to others in order to fulfill some perverse pleasure. I am talking about those people who love and accept themselves and make no apologies for such, even if others do not.

I am in such a situation at present. Life has presented me with an opportunity to fulfill a dream, a happiness that I thought was lost forever. The dilemma and the point in which most people seem to dwell on is that this opportunity arose around the same time as another change occurred in my life. The life change that happened first, just paved the way for this opportunity. Almost as if God Himself were the chess master and those of us involved were merely the pawns. I am a believer in God and that He has a definite plan for us. Who am I to mess with that?

There are people in my life who feel the need to impose their opinions about my opportunity and life change on me. I am not sure what they hope to achieve with this? Do they hope that I will look at them and promptly change my course of action? Do they think that I will look at their life course and feel envious that mine has been so fraught with trials and tribulations? Do they feel that I am unaware of the poor choices I have made in the past and that maybe I should just do my penance and never feel joy again? Do they not know that every bad choice, every good choice, every decision, experience, and action has made me who I am.

The person standing before them, the person I am, is the culmination of everything I have experienced, whether it be from choices I have made for myself or choices that have been inflicted upon me. The belief system I subscribe to, the moral code I live by, the personal law I abide by all had evolved over time. It has changed and grown. Not everyone is like that, and that is okay. There are people who have lived by the same set of rules and morals all their lives, making every choice based on that moral code...and there is nothing at all wrong with that...it takes a lot of strength and conviction to be true to that. It also takes strength to be able to change the things that are not working. In either case, the ultimate goal is to be true to yourself. That is what I intend to do. I will no longer make excuses for wanting to be happy. I will not apologize for seizing the opportunity that eluded me six years ago. I will not be ashamed of the situations that were not ideal, for those situations all taught me something, and those lessons are all what were needed to bring me to this point. This point of being on the brink of finding immense joy and fulfillment. Of embarking on yet another adventure, only this time with eyes wide open, fully aware of what I need and want to achieve. To have found a mate who sees all of the flaws I see, yet, does not see them as flaws, but as enhancements, as beauty, as perfection. I will make no apologies for finding the one thing that every person aspires to......to love and be loved for exactly who you are.

TODAY what I like about me: my strength and adaptability.